Why can't I change anything? To ascend to the stars in a sleep and beg  for forgiveness and then to return to my tired body and go by the autumn grass with scattered on it golden aspen leaves... I would walk for eternity, if at the end of the road you would be waiting for me...If I finally could cry tears of joy at your shoulder, if I would forget everything and the darkness around me would dissipate in the sunlight... If I would say goodbye to those before whom I am to blame...I know they would never want me to suffer, even if suffered themselves...They would let me go, would bless me... But we are just the grains of sand that wind blows from the hands of fate... In heaven there is no mercy for us...