I feel like someone has stolen my life, joy, love, laugh, my everything... I need it all back and a second chance...

Good old song to chill out and not to think of anything...

“Instead of committing suicide, people go to work.”
― Thomas Bernhard, Correction

It is never enough for you...
Never enough of my pain, of my despair, of my humiliation ...
By a twist of fate I became a prisoner and victim of yours ... It will be never enough for you...
And I can't escape, can't break the chain, can't fly to the sky, can't touch the wing of an angel..
Save me ... Revive me...

Time to drink the poison. You always were poisonous to me, but it does not matter anymore, I'm in the darkness already...Ray of hope dies out...

"Sigh no more, ladies, sigh no more,
Men were deceivers ever;
One foot in sea, and one on shore,
To one thing constant never."
--Balthazar, from Much Ado About Nothing

“If he acts, if he doesn't, it's meaningless. The whole thing goes forward. No one is important. No one at all.”
― Jesse Ball, The Curfew

'You only live twice: Once when you're born, and once when you look death in the face.'
Ian Fleming, You Only Live Twice.

I betrayed you again my little friends, I am so sorry, but my heart is almost gone....

Some stories can not end happily, in this case, the end is happiness itself. Some dreams can not come true, my cherished wish I had  to make afore, some dreams had died before birth, dissolved in poisoned blood, perished before I found out about them. My dream of you passed away  that spring day along with everything else I just was not aware of it. I can no longer hope,  can no longer believe, can no longer love,  black abyss is waiting for me.

"Love is like the rain. It comes in a drizzle sometimes. Then it starts pouring and if you're not careful it will drown you.”

-- Edwidge Danticat, Breath, Eyes, Memory

Sometimes the weight of a dream is so great, that when you leave it, the only thing you feel is relief.

“I struggled no more, but the agony of my soul found vent in one loud, long and final scream of despair.”
― Edgar Allan Poe, The Pit and the Pendulum

At least I had a beautiful dream, wonderful dimension of dream...
Where everything is possible, where everything is erased, where nothing is predetermined, where I'm happy, where I am embracing you...

Maybe in the next life...

“Accident ruled every corner of the universe except the chambers of the human heart.”

--David Guterson, Snow Falling on Cedars

Klamydia - Rakas hullu ((Have no idea what is the song about)

It is raining now...Rain, rain, rain... The sky is milky gray and  clear streams are hitting the branches of blooming acacias...I am tired to feel, I want to plunge into the gray fog, into oblivion, mist, haze... I want the rain to wash away my memory, the mist to engulf me and wet green grass to became a bed for me, I want to dissolve in the soft leaden cloud ... I am tired...

"Nowadays people seem to look on life as a speculation. It is not a speculation. It is a sacrament. Its ideal is Love. Its purification is Sacrifice."
--Lady Windermere from "Lady Windermere's Fan"

quote ;)

“His was the kind of beauty for which you would pay the price of a lifetime of sorrow and all the varieties of rage. Eventually, you would have to go to church to get rid of him.”
― Charles Baxter, Saul and Patsy

I wish I could let azure sky and clouds in, wish I could be filled with the rain, the wind and white snowflakes... I wish the darkness inside me was burned in rays of purifying sunlight...

You can do it, but you can't help me...

 Oh, golden skyey queen, full of glory,
 I beg you for the happy ending of my story...

Within Temptation - Edge of the World

"Hold you in my arms all night
And spill the wine until the end 

We all have our place in time,
Need to live every moment..."

--Within Temptation, Covered by roses

 

 

“Legends don't have to make sense. They just have to be beautiful. Or at least interesting.”
― Terry Pratchett, The Folklore of Discworld

"Looking inside of yourself
You might see someone you don't know
Maybe it's just what you need
Letting the river in you flow"

Dio

“Courage is not something that you already have that makes you brave when the tough times start. Courage is what you earn when you've been through the tough times and you discover they aren't so tough after all.”

DAVID & GOLIATH by Malcolm Gladwell

"This is your life
This is your time
What if the flame won't last forever
This is your here
This is your now
Let it be magical!"
Dio

Spring 7