Evening walk...

I wish...

I surrender. .. Ghost light was better than total darkness ... foolish hopes were better than voidness and silence ... Live the moment ... But how much is the moment in the dark desert worth, under empty pitiless skies, where even the stars can't be seen...

“I hope that real love and truth are stronger in the end than any evil or misfortune in the world.”
― Charles Dickens, David Copperfield

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"Pride is spiritual cancer: it eats up the very possibility of love, contentment, or even common sense."

Mere Christianity
C. S. Lewis

"Splinters in the heart, invisibly and erratically painful: this is how Fern has thought of her accumulating sorrows.... But perhaps they are more like the seeds inside a brightly patterned gourd, beyond germination but essential to the wholeness of the gourd itself."

-- Julia Glass, Three Junes

Swan roundel

You're like a wolf tearing a wounded animal in the woods. But nothing matters anymore...

Manowar - Brothers of Metal (live) HD720p

 talking of Manowar - great video...

.. like an anthem of life I dreamed to live, was walking around it, never reached it and now...

:)

Cold winds blow but the cricket chirping is still in the air. This endless vespertine chant sounds as if the night is still warm. The crickets soon will vanish and there will be silence instead of this entrancing, gentle melody of the rhythm of life. But today, their song is still soothing, evoking forgotten memories and peace.

Children, children, have no fear
Soon we all will disappear...

Helloween - Nabataea

Helloween Hold Me In Your Arms

I wish it was possible just for a minute, for a second... And then comes  the end of my story. I am tired to suffer, I am not fighting anymore, only drowning deeper and deeper...All hope is gone...

"It is hard to have patience with people who say,ʿThere is no deathʾ and ʿDeath doesn't matter.ʾ There is death. And whatever is matters. And whatever happens has consequences, and it and they are irrevocable and irreversible. You might as well say that birth doesn't matter."

~A Grief Observed. C. S. Lewis

My soul sounds so differently, so differently from yours. My love to you made me blind...But unneeded feeling is fading in the wind...I stay behind being poisoned, black, hopeless, desperate, waiting for my bitter end. There is no hope, no love, no salvation for me...It has to be so... I can't change anything...Just to fade like a ghost in the morning light...

Limbonic Art - Interstellar Overdrive

One more black spot on my soul ...
I will never break away ...
It's too late ...

Deathrow (No Regrets) by Hypocrisy

I'm scared... I'll never escape and I'm losing the last thing...My dream was nothing but an insane illusion,  my weak faith in deliverance and happiness was just a confusing night dream... All the light in my life  has been extinguished. And now goes out the last little flame that reflected my tormented soul...

HYPOCRISY - End Of Disclosure (OFFICIAL LYRIC VIDEO)

"In Answer" by Wang Wei (699-759 AD)

In these quiet years growing calmer,
Lacking knowledge of the world’s affairs,
I stop worrying how things will turn out.
My quiet mind makes no subtle plans.
Returning to the woods I love
A pine-tree breeze rustles in my robes.
Mountain moonlight fills the lute’s bowl,
Shows up what learning I have left.
If you ask what makes us rich or poor
Hear the Fisherman’s voice float to shore.
Zen poem

Hypocrisy - The Return

I feel like I have no right to anything. No right to look at the sunset sky, to see crystal stars, to inhale March wind, to listen to cawing of crows when the winter night descends...When did this feeling appear? Perhaps it has always existed, lived in my heart for ages...I have no right even to think about you, to see you in my dreams...It hurts and it is so hard to leave you behind...
I can't even be the center of my own universe, to say nothing of someone's ... And never could, though all was well then.....
But I wanted only silence and solitude for too long...far too long...
There are no ways back for me anymore...My crows flew away and did not carry off my soul on their unsightly black wings..
If only I could return to that time when spring wind was still refreshing, sky was dark-blue and magnificent, vague hopes were still alive...When the black bird in my heart has not yet spread its wings.
I will never embrace you..


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Hypocrisy - Paranormal Mysteria

“As flies to wanton boys are we to the gods.
They kill us for their sport.”
―from "King Lear"

“And then the dreams break into a million tiny pieces. The dream dies. Which leaves you with a choice: you can settle for reality, or you can go off, like a fool, and dream another dream.”

-- Nora Ephron, Heartburn